Tales of Symphonia Spoof......thingy.

Chronicles of Symphonia Vol.1

Intro.
By: Symphonia_Spoof Copyright: 2008-5122.5 A.D.
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Narrator1: Once upon a time there was a gaint tree that was the source of mana.

Narrator2: A war, however, caused the tree to wither away and a hero’s life was sacraficed to take it’s place.

Narrator3: * polishing his sword, completely oblivious to what the other two are saying*

Narrators1&2: ...........N3?

Narrator3: Huh? What? Someone break into the place?!?!? Where is he?!?!? *swinging his sword wildly from side to side* I’ll beat him with my sword!!! WHY CAN’T I SEE HIM!?!?!?!

*Narrator1 finally just whacks him with a frying pan, knocking him out*

Narrator3: * waking up* hmmm? Did you hit me with that N1?

Narrator1: Yeah, I did. You were having one of your “episodes” again.

Narrator3: Ah, yes. I completely understand. Now where were we? Oh. Right. Ahem. (With dramatic tone): Grieving over the loss the goddess disapeared unto the heavens.

Narrator1: The goddess left the angels with this edict:

Narrator2: “You must wake me, for if I should sleep, the world shall be destroyed."

Narrator3: (still in dramatic tone) The angels bore the Chosen One who headed towards the tower that reached up unto the heavens.

Narrator 1: And that marked the beginning of the regeneration of the world.
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Chapter 1

???: .......Lloyd!! Lloyd!!!! Lloyd Irving wake up!!!!! * Hits him in the head with a black board eraser*

Lloyd: *opens eyes slightly* Just...*yawn* a few more minutes....

???: *Grabs the rocket launcher that is conveniently located next to the black board.*

*view is zoomed out so the entire classroom is visible*

Lloyd: P-P-P-Professor Raine?!?!?!?!

Raine: I hope you learn from this Lloyd. *fires the launcher*

Lloyd: AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! * dives for his life at the last second as the rocket blows a train-sized hole in the wall*

Raine: How do you manage to sleep standing?

Lloyd: How the heck did you get a permit for that?!?!?

Raine: Never you mind. Now.....*turns the launcher at her younger brother Genis* Genis! Same question!

Genis: Mithos, the obvious hero and surely not the major antagonist of this game, brought an end to the Ancient War in the Holy Ground of Kharlan.

Raine: Correct. Afterwards, Mithos mad a pact with the Goddess Martel to seal away the Desians whom caused the war.

Lloyd: But the Desians came back and are making everyone suffer!!

Raine: We covered that in class last time. I even gave everyone a informational pamphlet.

Lloyd: Oh, right. * pulls out his " Bloodthirsty Desians & You” pamphlet and reads some out loud* .....Desians........human ranches........unnatural fear of agressive midgets...... yep, I got it.

Raine: Sure, Lloyd. Whatever you say. Moving on.....Today is the Day of Prophecy. It is a very important day, which the Chosen of Mana will receive an oracle from the goddess Martel. Now, Chosen One, Colette.

Colette: Yes Ma’am.

Raine: Tell us about the journey of world regeneration.

Colette: It is a journey to both seal the Desians and also stop their widespread chain of coffee shops. Upon passing the trials of the goddess Martel, The Summon Spirits that protect the world awaken, mana is restored, and the Desians go broke, thus ending their evil (*thinking to self* But soooooo good!) coffee monopoly.

Raine: Correct. Now for the next question — *suddenly a large & blinding light flashes*

Class: Woah!!!

Raine: Everyone settle down, it seems that the time for the oracle has come. I will go check on the chapel. Everyone stay put and study by yourselves, undersood?

Colette: Wait, Professor Raine, I’ll go with you.

Raine: No Collete. If it is the oracle, the priests will come for you. Wait here with everyone else.

Lloyd: Professor, you know that we’ll just follow you anyway.....

Raine: Fine, fine....* quickly runs out the door, shuts it and padlocks it about ten times* Hahahahahahah!!! Try to get out now!!!!!! * Runs into the distance laughing evily*

Lloyd: .....Genis, your sister is more of a moron than I thought. She left the rocket launcher next to her desk. *picks it up and fires it into the wall, making yet another train-sized hole in the building* Now we can leave!!!!!

Genis: Lloyd!!!!! Now there are two holes in the school!!

Lloyd:Oh-h-h-h. Right.... They’ll get lonely!! * shoots the launcher again making a hole in the roof this time* There. All better.

Colette: That was some quick thinking Lloyd!! Nice Work!

Lloyd: Onward to the temple!!!! * Lloyd & Colette walk away*

Genis: Why do I hang out with them.....?
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Narrator1: Why do you make him hang out with them?

Narrator3: Fun entertainment , boredom.....

Narrator2: Good enough for me.

Narrator1: I’m sure it is.

*fades to black*

End of Chapter 1

Feedback, people.......

Was this in the game?

HALOOOOOOOO wrote: Was this in the game?

What do you mean? The random narrators are original, but the basic storyline is the same.

Well, since no one is saying if they like it or not, I’ll just post the 2nd chapter.

Chapter 2

Narrator1: After a breif fight with a few monsters and a strange intro to the targeting system, the trio reaches the Martel Temple.
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Lloyd: Woah! That light really is coming from the temple!

Genis: The oracle is going to be conveyed. Colette’s going to be the Chosen of Regeneration.

Colette: *rolling on the ground & clawing at her eyes* WE BURN!!!!! IT BURNS US!!!!!!!!!!

Lloyd & Genis:...... You can’t just look straight at it you know..........Colette?

Colette: *Now stitting in a frog-like position* LOST!!!!! THE PRECIOUS IS LOST!!!!!

Lloyd: Colette!!! Are you crazy? ........You know that we would never lose......The Precious...*gets out the One Ring and stares at it for a good 30 seconds before putting it away on his pocket*

Genis:.....Are you two ok?

*after Colette gets back up, regains her sight and stops being Gollum*

Lloyd: Say Colette.... when the oracle is conveyed you’ll become the Chosen who will save the world right? Your going to be like the hero Mithos!

Genis: A cross-dresser?

*Narrator 3 appears in a flash of light*

N3: Since Raine is not here, I’ll be doing this instead. *slaps Genis in the back of the head*

Genis: OWWWW!!!!!

N3: Wimp. You’d think with all the beatings that Raine gives him he would be able to deal with it better. Well, my work here is done. * dissapears*

Genis: I hate that guy......

Lloyd: I don’t. He hits you harder than Raine!!

Genis: I’ll be mad about that later..... Hey, there’s a lot of commotion at the temple.

Lloyd: You’re right!

* sounds of battle can be heard and a gravely wounded pastor limps his way down the steps*

Pastor: Chosen One! * falls to the ground*

Lloyd: Are you all right!?

Pastor: (to Genis) Not very bright is he?

Genis: Finally someone besides me and Raine sees it!

Pastor: The Desians came to the temple and offered us some coffee so we would lower our guard. I’m sad to say that it worked. While we were sipping our decaf lattes they attacked, and in fear of spilling our coffee, there was nothing we could do.

Colette: Now I see why those coffee shops have to be shut down... to save lives!!

Pastor: I regret that I will not...be...able...to....protect...the...Cho...sen. *dies*

Colette: Pastor hang on!!

Lloyd: It’s no good....he’s with the Narrators now.

Genis: Poor guy....

Colette: I’m going.

Genis: Colette there are Desians in there!

Colette: Yes....but I have to go. I’m the Chosen. My job is to accept the oracle on the Day of Prophecy. You two wait here, okay?

Genis: Lloyd, are you going to let Colette go by herself?!

Lloyd: I’m going too.

Colette: Are you sure? It’s dangerous.

Lloyd: Dwarven vow #1: Let’s all work together of a peaceful world. Let’s go.

Genis: Wait, I’m going too. I’m worried about Raine.

Colette: Thanks. Both of you.

Narrator2: They climb the stairs to the temple. ( ......Man, the narration in this chapter is pointless... ) When they get to the top they find a group of four Desians that had cornered Colette’s grandmother Phaidra.

Man: Where is the Chosen?

Phiadra: *noticing Colette and the others* Run, Colette!!

Desian Soldier: Lord Botta, there she is!

Botta: Chosen One! Your life is mine!

Lloyd:*draws sword* I won’t let you Desians get away with anything!

Desian Soldier: Desians? .... Hahahah!

Genis: What’s so funny?

Desian Soldier: You’re a midget!!!! * rolls on the ground laughing his head off* .....Midget!!!!!!!

Desian Soldier2: Well then, die at the hands of the Desians you so hate. Get them!

Narrator 3: They battle and Lloyd’s group , despite Colette’s constant tripping over herself....and rocks.....and bugs......and a few random dust particles, comes out on top. After being beaten the Desians soldiers run away and a new enemy, Vidarr, who has a spiked chain mace, appears.

Viddar: Do not get in our way!

Narrator2: The group fights Vidarr, lose and are wounded.

Lloyd: This guy’s really tough!

Narrator1: Just as Vidarr is about to finish the heros off, a mysterious man swoops in and saves them.

Lloyd: Who are you?

Mysterious Man: Get out of the way.

Narrator3: With the Mysterious Man’s fighting ability on their side the heros manage to win.

Botta: I never though you’d show up.... Dang! Retreat for now!

Narrator2: The Desians fled, but now new questions remain: Who is this man? What does he want? Why did he save the trio? Is he Lloyd’s long lost father? Answers to all these questions (execpt the last one that is...heh..heh) in the next chapter!

End of Chapter 2
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Sorry. What I meant was is all this text in the Tales of Symphonia game, or is it a fan creation or along those lines?

Wow, this topic failed pretty hard.

HALOOOOOOOO wrote: Sorry. What I meant was is all this text in the Tales of Symphonia game, or is it a fan creation or along those lines?

Well, given the fact that the word “spoof” if in the title, you can be fairly sure it’s fan created.