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I think this story is great! At the moment I’m 14 and couldn’t do better! so all those who are willing to challange this story are going to lose easily!

SHIT_HAPPENS wrote: As I was walking out into the small parking lot bloodied up with my lip feeling numb, my eye aching, and my head vibrating.. which occured from a fight. I fought for a girl that I liked since she was getting hit by fat and bulky bullies, as I saw what they were doing.. I quickly yelled at them to stop them from doing what they are doing. Suddenly all 3 of them ganged up on me pushing me back into a wall making me feel like my stomach was being pulled in because I was so nervous.
Once they have beaten me up I was just lying on the cold tarmac feeling ashamed and angry, it was cold.. my eyes would squint so they wouldn’t freeze and my fingertips felt like I was putting them into a pile of snow.
I then got up and ran to an abandoned and dark parking lot to think and ponder on why I even tried to help the girl. The wind started to become faster as my hair swept over my eyes and my arms crossed to give myself warmth..then I felt a nice fur coat jacket being put over me.
It was the girl I liked, she was covering my shivering body up with an extra jacket she had.. she then gave me a hug and made me feel like i’m at home. I could smell her nice orange and rose like perfume as she hugged me.
We both suddenly hugged eachother tight as I wrapped my arms around her, then we looked at eachother like we’ve been waiting for this moment for a long time. She put her cold hands on my cheek and was slowly closing her eyes and pulling her face towards me.. I did the same thing and we connected our cold lips, the feeling of the kiss was like a very cold and wet feeling at the start of the kiss.. but when we relaxed the wetness and coldness feeling was gone. I had felt like everything that happened to me was fake and someone unexpectingly saved me from myself.

I remeber writing this story at the age of 13 just for fun...lol.

tl;dr

that is so lol i would even do better than u and im 11. U are alright at writing i suppose but better not get ur hopes up! anyway i spose i gota say congrats so thats ur applause! Bye Rigles Out

What was the point of repeating it?

As I was walking out into the small parking lot bloodied up with my lip feeling numb, my eye aching, and my head vibrating.. which occured from a fight. I fought for a girl that I liked since she was getting hit by fat and bulky bullies, as I saw what they were doing.. I quickly yelled at them to stop them from doing what they are doing. Suddenly all 3 of them ganged up on me pushing me back into a wall making me feel like my stomach was being pulled in because I was so nervous.
Once they have beaten me up I was just lying on the cold tarmac feeling ashamed and angry, it was cold.. my eyes would squint so they wouldn’t freeze and my fingertips felt like I was putting them into a pile of snow.
I then got up and ran to an abandoned and dark parking lot to think and ponder on why I even tried to help the girl. The wind started to become faster as my hair swept over my eyes and my arms crossed to give myself warmth..then I felt a nice fur coat jacket being put over me.
It was the girl I liked, she was covering my shivering body up with an extra jacket she had.. she then gave me a hug and made me feel like i’m at home. I could smell her nice orange and rose like perfume as she hugged me.
We both suddenly hugged eachother tight as I wrapped my arms around her, then we looked at eachother like we’ve been waiting for this moment for a long time. She put her cold hands on my cheek and was slowly closing her eyes and pulling her face towards me.. I did the same thing and we connected our cold lips, the feeling of the kiss was like a very cold and wet feeling at the start of the kiss.. but when we relaxed the wetness and coldness feeling was gone. I had felt like everything that happened to me was fake and someone unexpectingly saved me from myself.

Cool, someone bumbed my 2 month old thread!

You introduced new facts at really weird moments in the sentence. Idk it just felt strange to read.

A bit crap but you were 13 I guess.

eh

asdyddddddddddddddddduasy

Nice story hope na sana you create more. congrats....