| 25 Jan 2007 09:55 pm |
UBER 1337 Poster Rep: 3  Joined: 12 May 2006 Posts: 2,132 OFFLINE | It feels like I’m reliving my childhood. It was ripped apart by war. Father dies, then my brothers run off to die with him. Then my brother my closest friend, my only brother left that I got to play with and love and just have fun, goes off and dies. I blamed everyone, including my mother, as if she wasn’t depressed enough. Then when I told here I was leaving, I could tell that I killed her, the last bit off hope in her life was going off to war to die. She never spoke to me again, exsept that letter. I forget what topic it was, but I think it was the gothic one or something, I wrote it down there. My whole life is printed on this website, I am an open book.
Now that I can’t see my family, I feel like I’m ripping my family apart, that now its my fault. All I can do is stay alive. | |
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| 25 Jan 2007 09:56 pm |
The Pendragon Rep: 34  Joined: 06 Sep 2005 Posts: 48,244 OFFLINE | Zucas wrote:
Yep most definetly. Gosh making me feel worse just saying that but it’s the truth.
It’s better to speak the truth than hide it, my opinion.
-={Amin Wile Ilyamenie Liy End Rimmi Llie}=-
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| 25 Jan 2007 09:57 pm |
Agent of Chaos Rep: 54 Joined: 10 Aug 2005 Posts: 40,050 OFFLINE | I wish I could learn that so many times before TR. ---
 
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| 25 Jan 2007 09:59 pm |
The Pendragon Rep: 34Joined: 06 Sep 2005 Posts: 48,244 OFFLINE | I wish I would listen to my own advice... ---
-={Amin Wile Ilyamenie Liy End Rimmi Llie}=-
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| 25 Jan 2007 09:59 pm |
UBER 1337 Poster Rep: 3Joined: 12 May 2006 Posts: 2,132 OFFLINE | It sucks guys. Trully does. But thats life. | |
| 25 Jan 2007 10:00 pm |
Agent of Chaos Rep: 54Joined: 10 Aug 2005 Posts: 40,050 OFFLINE | Tyreaus Rhade wrote:
I wish I would listen to my own advice...
Yea I complain about people being hypocrites but in truth I’m too much of a hypocrite to my own words. I know I’d be happier if I just took my own advice. Gosh I’ve just screwed up way too many times and hurt other people because of it. Argh.
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| 25 Jan 2007 10:02 pm |
The Pendragon Rep: 34Joined: 06 Sep 2005 Posts: 48,244 OFFLINE | I don’t take my own advice cos of fear...I mean it’s like I can’t do things right half the time so I just can’t trust myself with that...so I don’t know where I would be if I did listen to it sometimes...
The worst part is I keep on saying “everything’s alright I’m fine” and I keep on lying...not helping anything by that... ---
-={Amin Wile Ilyamenie Liy End Rimmi Llie}=-
Last edited 25 Jan 2007 10:02 pm by Tyreaus Rhade | |
| 25 Jan 2007 10:02 pm |
Agent of Chaos Rep: 54Joined: 10 Aug 2005 Posts: 40,050 OFFLINE | Savage Snake wrote:
It sucks guys. Trully does. But thats life.
Yea life is supposed to suck I guess but I just see all my friends and other people and their happy. Tehy look happy and act happy and it almost makes me cry to know I’m not happy. I mean I’m a tough dude and probably look like a jock but I could cry everynow and then and probably should to let some of it out. I just want to be happy again like I used to be but I don’t even know if I can figure out how. Yea sorry that just all kinda came out.
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| 25 Jan 2007 10:04 pm |
The Pendragon Rep: 34Joined: 06 Sep 2005 Posts: 48,244 OFFLINE | Zucas wrote:
Savage Snake wrote:
It sucks guys. Trully does. But thats life.
Yea life is supposed to suck I guess but I just see all my friends and other people and their happy. Tehy look happy and act happy and it almost makes me cry to know I’m not happy. I mean I’m a tough dude and probably look like a jock but I could cry everynow and then and probably should to let some of it out. I just want to be happy again like I used to be but I don’t even know if I can figure out how. Yea sorry that just all kinda came out.
I’d let some of it out but when they ask me what’s wrong the first thing that’ll come out of me is “nothing”...and if they ask again I just tell them they shouldn’t worry...
Like I said, listening to my own advice would be good sometimes...
-={Amin Wile Ilyamenie Liy End Rimmi Llie}=-
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| 25 Jan 2007 10:07 pm |
Agent of Chaos Rep: 54Joined: 10 Aug 2005 Posts: 40,050 OFFLINE | Gosh and now I just found out some more piece of info from my situation and now I feel even worse cause it’s not me that’s hurt but someone else. DAmn I almost feel like I could slam my jammed finger into my keyboard right now. ---
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| 25 Jan 2007 10:07 pm |
Nyarlathotep Rep: 12 Joined: 26 Jun 2005 Posts: 6,946 OFFLINE | Tyreaus Rhade wrote:
Zucas wrote:
Savage Snake wrote:
It sucks guys. Trully does. But thats life.
Yea life is supposed to suck I guess but I just see all my friends and other people and their happy. Tehy look happy and act happy and it almost makes me cry to know I’m not happy. I mean I’m a tough dude and probably look like a jock but I could cry everynow and then and probably should to let some of it out. I just want to be happy again like I used to be but I don’t even know if I can figure out how. Yea sorry that just all kinda came out.
I’d let some of it out but when they ask me what’s wrong the first thing that’ll come out of me is “nothing”...and if they ask again I just tell them they shouldn’t worry...
Like I said, listening to my own advice would be good sometimes...
Thats exactly what I tell people!!!
Not dead that which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons death may die.
- H. P. Lovecraft Join the Order | |
| 25 Jan 2007 10:09 pm |
King of the Gamer Army Rep: 38 Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Posts: 14,674 OFFLINE | If I were you this training operation would be my last mission. You’ve already served in Afghanistan and Iraq and that is a lot. You have done more than your share and you have to think about yourself. You can’t let the world tear you apart because you are willing to spend your whole life doing something for them. Sometimes you just have to do it for yourself. Your family needs you and that means just as much as your country and more. The U.S. can be blown to hell but as long as if you still have your family that will make the difference. ---
 the21gamer wrote:
ramunematt wrote:
Did you hear me? I’m a bigger better pussy than you’ll ever be.
Wtf...
Last edited 25 Jan 2007 10:10 pm by the21gamer | |
| 25 Jan 2007 10:10 pm |
Nyarlathotep Rep: 12Joined: 26 Jun 2005 Posts: 6,946 OFFLINE | Some military guys retire at like, 60. And have families. ---
Not dead that which can eternal lie,
And with strange aeons death may die.
- H. P. Lovecraft Join the Order | |
| 25 Jan 2007 10:11 pm |
Going Sentimental Rep: 27 Joined: 01 Aug 2005 Posts: 7,796 | Savage Snake wrote:
It feels like I’m reliving my childhood. It was ripped apart by war. Father dies, then my brothers run off to die with him. Then my brother my closest friend, my only brother left that I got to play with and love and just have fun, goes off and dies. I blamed everyone, including my mother, as if she wasn’t depressed enough. Then when I told here I was leaving, I could tell that I killed her, the last bit off hope in her life was going off to war to die. She never spoke to me again, exsept that letter. I forget what topic it was, but I think it was the gothic one or something, I wrote it down there. My whole life is printed on this website, I am an open book.
Now that I can’t see my family, I feel like I’m ripping my family apart, that now its my fault. All I can do is stay alive.
I guess you do not want our pity, but I am afraid to say you have earned it nonetheless. I am sure that if you had talked to your mother again, she would accept your call. Talk to her, tell her how much you miss her and the rest. And as for your brothers and father, giving the standard “they died for their country” gives no solace, and no mental support. I can only say that you have the future to live to, and that you must forget the past. I do doubt that your wife is cheating on you, and it is standard paranoia that you are feeling from being isolated.
"We can’t solve problems using the same thinking we used when we created them." - Albert Einstein
Procedure for Posting Images...General Rules | |
| 25 Jan 2007 10:12 pm |
King of the Gamer Army Rep: 38Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Posts: 14,674 OFFLINE | ChaosSpartan wrote:
Some military guys retire at like, 60. And have families.
But when it tears you apart your entire life it is not worth it.
the21gamer wrote:
ramunematt wrote:
Did you hear me? I’m a bigger better pussy than you’ll ever be.
Wtf...
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| 25 Jan 2007 10:12 pm |
The Pendragon Rep: 34Joined: 06 Sep 2005 Posts: 48,244 OFFLINE | Zucas wrote:
Gosh and now I just found out some more piece of info from my situation and now I feel even worse cause it’s not me that’s hurt but someone else. DAmn I almost feel like I could slam my jammed finger into my keyboard right now.
Whenever I hurt other people I just want to break something of mine too...I could care less about myself but other people get to me...
I have to go, goodbye.
-={Amin Wile Ilyamenie Liy End Rimmi Llie}=-
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| 25 Jan 2007 10:12 pm |
King of the Gamer Army Rep: 38Joined: 22 Nov 2005 Posts: 14,674 OFFLINE | goldenraptor wrote:
Savage Snake wrote:
It feels like I’m reliving my childhood. It was ripped apart by war. Father dies, then my brothers run off to die with him. Then my brother my closest friend, my only brother left that I got to play with and love and just have fun, goes off and dies. I blamed everyone, including my mother, as if she wasn’t depressed enough. Then when I told here I was leaving, I could tell that I killed her, the last bit off hope in her life was going off to war to die. She never spoke to me again, exsept that letter. I forget what topic it was, but I think it was the gothic one or something, I wrote it down there. My whole life is printed on this website, I am an open book.
Now that I can’t see my family, I feel like I’m ripping my family apart, that now its my fault. All I can do is stay alive.
I guess you do not want our pity, but I am afraid to say you have earned it nonetheless. I am sure that if you had talked to your mother again, she would accept your call. Talk to her, tell her how much you miss her and the rest. And as for your brothers and father, giving the standard “they died for their country” gives no solace, and no mental support. I can only say that you have the future to live to, and that you must forget the past. I do doubt that your wife is cheating on you, and it is standard paranoia that you are feeling from being isolated.
His mom is gone.
the21gamer wrote:
ramunematt wrote:
Did you hear me? I’m a bigger better pussy than you’ll ever be.
Wtf...
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| 25 Jan 2007 10:13 pm |
Agent of Chaos Rep: 54Joined: 10 Aug 2005 Posts: 40,050 OFFLINE | Bye TR thx for the help. ---
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| 25 Jan 2007 10:14 pm |
------SSDD------ Rep: 36 Joined: 25 Aug 2006 Posts: 12,676 OFFLINE | I dono, Ive been told I can help peoples self esteem, alright, I’ll see if I can help you, tell me a bit about your self, (past experiences, anything your comfortable sharing with a random person) ---
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| 25 Jan 2007 10:15 pm |
Agent of Chaos Rep: 54Joined: 10 Aug 2005 Posts: 40,050 OFFLINE | Carl- why don’t you share us your Vietnam story. I never felt like going back to find the topic so you can tell all the new people who haven’t heard it. I’m sure there are a lot who are curious. ---
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