Mickey goes to the judge after speaking to him before about getting a divorce with Minney. The judge says “I’m sorry Mickey but I couldn’t find grounds for divorce for being insane. Mickey looks stunned and says “I didn’t say she was insane I said she was fuc**ing Goofy
How many emo kids does it take to eat a taco? 5. One to buy th taco, one to make a myspace about the taco, one to make a livejournal about the taco, one to take pictures in the mirror of the taco, and one to eat the taco.
How many bad jokes dose it take before a terminator comes back from the future to kill you?
75000, ya
--- Dogbert said the deepest thing ever.
“It is all a part of the big illusion we perpetuate upon ourselves and which is in turn perpetuated upon us. When we believe we engage the illusion, when we stop believing we shatter the illusion and ourselves in the process because we are part of it."
Radamanthis 1 wrote:
Show me that you can do it better. :Þ
Ok.
A man walks into a pet shop and asks for some dog food. The shopkeeper said
“I’m sorry, we do not sell dog food if you do not have your dog."
The next day the man asks for some cat food. The shopkeeper said
“I’m sorry, we do not sell cat food if you do not have your cat."
The next day the man comes in and pulls out a plastic bag.
“Whats inside it? asked the shoopkeeper.
“Feel yourself."
He put his hand in the bag.
“It’s all squishy and squelchy."
“Yes, I know. I’d like to buy some toilet roll please.
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson goes on a camping trip. After a good dinner and a bottle of wine, they retire for the night, and go to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes wakes up and nudges his faithful friend.
‘Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.”
I see millions and millions of stars, Holmes,” replies Watson.
“And what do you deduce from that?”
Watson ponders for a minute.
“Well, astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three.
“Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are a small and insignificant part of the universe. What does it tell you, Holmes?”
Holmes is silent for a moment. ‘Watson, you idiot!” he says. “Someone has stolen our tent!”
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