A man walks into a room. His worst enemy is holding a grenade, and the other guy has a baseball bat. Who wins? The guy with a baseball bat. The guy with a grenade throws it. The other guy picks up the grenade, pulls out the pin, and throws it back!
mr 1 2 i dont like you wrote:
A man walks into a room. His worst enemy is holding a grenade, and the other guy has a baseball bat. Who wins? The guy with a baseball bat. The guy with a grenade throws it. The other guy picks up the grenade, pulls out the pin, and throws it back!
A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $5.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of men.
“Yes?" she enquires with a knowing smile, “Can I help you?"
“I was wondering”, whispers the man, “are you the one who gives the hand-jobs?"
“Yes” she purrs “I am."
The man replies “Well wash your fucking hands, I want a cheese sandwich!"
What i wanted is that Everybody put something funny, or a joke, each day, but yes i should have put the joke for the day, I have to go back to the study,
A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out during one particularly icy winter. Because both had jobs, they had difficulty coordinating their travel schedules. It was decided that the husband would fly to Florida on a Thursday, and his wife would follow him the next day. Upon arriving as planned, the husband checked into the hotel. There he decided to open his laptop and send his wife an e-mail back in Minneapolis. However, he accidentally left off one letter in her address, and sent the e-mail without realizing his error.
In Houston, a widow had just returned from her husband’s funeral. He was a minister of many years who had been 'called home to glory' following a heart attack. The widow checked her e-mail, expecting messages from relatives and friends. Upon reading the first message, she fainted and fell to the floor. The widow’s son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:
To: My Loving Wife
From: Your Departed Husband
Subject: I’ve Arrived!
I’ve just arrived and have checked in. I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
There were 3 guys driving in the desert, when their car broke down. each of them were going to bring 1 item with them. the first guy decided to bring a water bottle. the other two asked
“why”
the guy replied
“so that when i get hot i can just take a drink or poor the water over myself to cool down”
the second guy decided to take a portible fan
the other 2 asked
“why”
he replied
“so that when i get hot i can just turn on the fan to cool down”
the third guy decided to bring the car door.
the other 2, with a strange look on their faces asked
“why!?!?"
which he responded with
“so that when i get hot i could just roll down the window”
France and another country go to war. In the end, france wins, and the other soldiers plea “Mercy!" The french then wonder why the soldiers were thanking them for making them surrender.
mr 1 2 i dont like you wrote:
France and another country go to war. In the end, france wins, and the other soldiers plea “Mercy!" The french then wonder why the soldiers were thanking them for making them surrender.
a king has 3 lovly daughters that he is marrying off to the first 3 men that can do a task for him. the king asks the 3 men that show up to go find him a fruit.
the first guy comes back with a grape. the king says
“good job. now shove it up your butt and you can marry my daughter." so he does and he marrys the first daughter.
the second guy comes back with an apple.
the king says.
“good job. now shove it up your butt and you can marry my daughter." so he does and he marrys the second daughter.
at about that time the second guy starts laughing histaricly.
Katie is sleeping and the teacher asks her a question.
“Katie, who created Heaven and Earth?" Joey sees Katie sleeping and quickly pokes her with a sharp pencil.
“Jesus Christ almighty! !" Exclaimed Katie.
“Correct." Says the teacher.
So the next day the same incident occurs and the same question comes up “Who created Heaven and Earth?" Katie (Again sleeping) is poked by Joey’s pencil “Jesus Christ almighty!" she exclaims.
“Correct again." Says the teacher.
So the next day, for a 3rd time, The teacher asks Katie “What did Eve say to Adam when she had so many children?"
Katie (again sleeping) is poked by Joey’s pencil again, and screams “If you stick that thing in me one more time I am going to crack it in half!"
mr 1 2 i dont like you wrote:
France and another country go to war. In the end, france wins, and the other soldiers plea “Mercy!" The french then wonder why the soldiers were thanking them for making them surrender.
...OH I GET IT!!!
It’s funny because France doesn’t ever go to war, and when it does, it looses
mr 1 2 i dont like you wrote:
France and another country go to war. In the end, france wins, and the other soldiers plea “Mercy!" The french then wonder why the soldiers were thanking them for making them surrender.
...OH I GET IT!!!
It’s funny because France doesn’t ever go to war, and when it does, it looses
mr 1 2 i dont like you wrote:
A man walks into a room. His worst enemy is holding a grenade, and the other guy has a baseball bat. Who wins? The guy with a baseball bat. The guy with a grenade throws it. The other guy picks up the grenade, pulls out the pin, and throws it back!
I don’t get it.....I wana buy an O!
Ok, $20 for the o
NEWSFLASH: The selling of o’s has been severly damaged, there is now a 1% chance of them being successfully delivered.
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