this is a song i wrote tell me what you think

Cz

Guest

ok this is one of my songs that i wrote, i dont know if its that good, so tell me what you think. 9and i know some of the parts might sound like they are copyed, but i said i dont know if its that good so just read it)


“Must be mine”
written by me

(Chorus)
ooooo He looks good
He looks good cause’ he’s from the hood
ooooo He’s so fine
Hes so fine that he must be mine

ooooo He looks freak
He looks freak cause’ he’s super sheak
ooooo He’s so fine
He looks so fine that he must be mine

(Verse 1)
I’m so sick and tired tryin’ to figure out what to do, to get you
Baby when you walk down that street, I can’t help to stare
I keep wishing that I was there
Cause that’s where I wanna’ be
It’s with you and me, baby

(Chorus)

(Verse 2)
When im hangin with my girls and they talkin’ bout’, talkin’, talkin bout’ they men
I always think they’ll never understand
When I think about you, I feel something new
Ive never felt this way before
And now I just want more, cause I cant get over YOU

lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala lalalalalala

(Chorus)

Rap (this is for a guy)
I see you on the block and im thinking its 50 50
So I wanna see us like bobby and whitney
Cause girl you don’t understand
When I meet you, you already had a man
Now I’m taking you on trips and shows, lets go
I can’t help staring at you, you look like a model
And I’m think maybe I can rube you outa that bottle
Like Christina sayin nobody can hold heer down
Now I’ll be the one to turn you back round’

(Chorus)

tell me what you think

Kelly

Guest

omg girl that song is soooooooo good

Kelly

Guest

have you written any more songs?

big gay fag

Guest

are u taking the fuckin piss???

thats bollox

Cz

Guest

yeah i have written 3 other songs but i just started song writtin

Kelly

Guest

no your wrong that song is so good

warrior 1992

Guest

cool, i think it is good.

Cz

Guest

thanx warrior 1992

warrior 1992

Guest

anytime.

Cz

Guest

do any of you guys write songs?

warrior 1992

Guest

i write music if that counts.

Cz

Guest

oh, yeah that counts
what kind of music?

warrior 1992

Guest

mainly blues, sometimes exciting fast songs.

Cz

Guest

o, thats good, how many songs have you wrote?

Cz

Guest

i have to go to work now


ill bb on around like 7ish

bye

~*Cz*~

warrior 1992

Guest

3 or 4, maybe more, but usually i make up a really good song or tune and then i lose it.either someone steels it pretending its theirs or i hav to put it in a safe. i got a few i havent lost. keyboard ones or cello.

warrior 1992

Guest

see u.

mr.faggot

Guest

man, i beat off to that song its so good.

OOOHYAHAYAHAYAHAYAH *snap*


AHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHHA

ASJGDHFIOUWHBNQFJHQOWUFHQ

Regular
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Joined: 19 Jul 2005
Posts: 164
OFFLINE

i write poems heres on
Discarded Love

Bleak midwinter
And snow lies all around,
My heart is cold and empty
And I long to walk on the hot sand
With the sun burning my body
And my love close at hand
Will you ever return?
Or will I always live in bleak midwinter
Send me word of where you are
Have you found a new love?
Have you moved on to someone new?
I am still in a frozen state
Stuck rigid where you left me
Unable to move on
One kiss would thaw my bones
One moment of bliss would unfreeze my toes
I would follow you to the ends of the earth
But my feet are frozen to the ground
And all around there is no sound
In this frozen wilderness
I will live forever
Suspended in time,
A monument to discarded love.

Daniel Whitehouse

Copyright ©2005 Daniel Whitehouse

warrior 1992

Guest

i swear i saw that poem on another forum.